Thoughts And Projects For The Future·
Below I wanted to reflect on the past year and solidify some ideas I’ve been having on mental/physical health. I also wanted to start discussing a project I’m interested in sharing in a development blog sort of fashion.
My last real article was at the beginning of the novel corona virus outbreak. Between then and now the world and I have changed. In reflection on working from home and living during quarantine I’ve come to realize some truths about myself:
Intense daily repetition and social isolation causes intrusive thoughts and eventually self destructive behavior
To be truly independent we need to ask for help.
During the past fall and early winter I’ve gone through periods of intense isolation and repetition. Specifically I went months without really leaving my home except for food, and each day was spent doing the same routine of rolling out of bed getting on a computer, working, eating, and then sleeping. With some breaks to watch TV/slack-off, or as my parents would call it when I was growing up, “Vegetate.” This cycle quickly caused me to have depressive behaviors. With nothing to break up the day, all of my daily actions would give me anxiety and I began to stress out over the smallest topics/details. Getting up and doing the same action each day became harder.
What finally broke my depressive cycle was varied social interaction, which oddly enough I wanted to avoid at all costs. Specifically I began speaking about my problems to those who I loved. Just talking about my issues and feeling truly vulnerable enabled me to brake me out of my rut. I know talking about personal issues and problems isn’t rocket surgery. However, for me it’s been a new skill to learn.
While growing up, I had an idea about what it really meant to be an “adult.” I needed to be strong, independent, tenacious, and intelligent. While great traits to have they really miss the point. Being an adult is best when sharing life with others, and insurmountable difficulties are inevitable.
I now understand becoming more mature is more like finding my childhood. Empathy, humility, kindness, and thoughtfulness are some of the first lessons I had during pre-school. I think I somehow lost them along the way, and in relearning I found out how to get back up.
Some background first, I’m a software engineer by passion and trade. I really enjoy authoring programs, and solving technical problems. I want to try and let others into this world regardless of skill level to see what the process is actually like.
I’ve recently started a new job at a fantastic company, Marklogic. Without getting into too much detail my current team has been using the Python programming language. In my past work I hadn’t really had to interact with Python in any professional capacity. I’ve done some small projects and I have a passing understanding of it, however I never really had to work with it deeply.
In a few coming articles I will explore an example project of creating a webcrawler from scratch.